Love and the six month theory

In one of my countless Psychology classes, I learned about the six month theory of romantic relationships.

The professor started out by saying that this theory was proven in clinical studies as well as  surveys conducted over a very long period of time.

Then he proceeded:

Warning! Never make any long term plans with somebody in the first six months of the relationship, no matter how much in love you think you are.

The gasps in the room were audible. From that moment on, everyone hung on the professor's every word.

It's not by chance that we call it "falling" in love, because for a six month period, when it comes to an exciting new relationship, all our faculties are not fully functional regarding our mate. Basically, your beloved could do no wrong in your eyes. They can have horns coming out of her or his head, and everybody could see them, except you.

Then suddenly, six months later, almost to the day, the veil drops, and you see everything very clearly. If your partner does indeed have horns, you'll see them. If they have a halo, you'll see that too.

This theory may explain the quickie marriages and divorces. It may also explain many relationships that still hang on, for all the wrong reasons. Both partners are miserable, but they stay together anyway. A decision that is made while you're not fully functional may become a life sentence.

In any case, the six month theory, as described above, was research from the 1980's. Since then, everything seems to have picked up speed, and the six month theory may be one of them.

Perhaps now, the six month theory is more likely the three month theory. Or maybe, since love is so simple yet such an enigma, it still remains the six month theory.

They say that it takes less than 10 seconds to fall in love. Whether that's true or not, take the rest of the six months to recover from the fall. Decide with your eyes wide open. If it's meant to be, it will be, and if not, there's always another chance. Never give up on love. It can happen at any time, to anyone.

I hope that you will use the knowledge of the six month theory for your own good, and for the good of all concerned.

Best wishes,

Carmen Colombo
April 10th, 2005